PGA MEMBER

Yesterday I received my PGA membership packet in the mail. It was so surreal. It's hard to really enjoy good things when so many bad things are going on. But it was still exciting. I got a few DVD screenings in the packet. That was so cool. I don't know about other folks but I tend to eat more the broker I am. It's so weird. When I don't have to worry about buying food, I can fast for 3 days hahaha.

Sleeping in the car last night was a little better because I discovered the phone game, Word Mole and I played it til I fell asleep, so it made the night go by quicker. This has been the longest week ever.

Homeless Days

Last night was the 3rd night I slept in my car. One night I slept in one of my buddies music studios. As of October 9, 2010, I officially became homeless. I arrived back in Los Angeles at 8:45am. My dear sweet sister gave me $250.00 and my other family members gave me $60.00. After paying for a new postal box address and paying storage fees and miscellaneous/food items. I was down to little of nothing again with no funds coming in for a few weeks. I do get unemployment but I'm down to the last $19 check and hope and pray that they give me an extension.

The first night was weird. I slept on the street where I'd stayed in the motel, a familiar area. To climb into the back part of my hatchback to sleep through the night brought such a blank feeling. Here I am trying to turn my life around and one year after graduating college, I'm officially homeless with nowhere to go.

The second night I thought to myself, if this is what I have to do to try to make it work, then so be it. At least I have a vehicle that I can sleep in. I don't have to go to the shelters which have such bad reputations. I parked on a dark street near the college campus.

The third night I slept on the floor on a futon of a buddies music studio. It felt good to have a roof over my head even if it was a real apartment.

Last night was about the same as the first two nights. This time I parked on a street not too far from the motel, a side street that was more quiet. I'll probably go back there tonight.

My family all think that I'm staying back at the motel. I just can't tell them the truth because I don't want my middle sister worrying about me. She has done so much for the family already and it's not her job to take care of me. So I can't tell her. But she is going to be very, very upset with me. SO ALL OF THIS IS A SECRET. I choose to write so that I don't ever forget what I'm going through right now.

I get up and go to a 24 hour restaurant and use the restroom or go to the student union at the school campus. When it gets to the point where I need to shower, I'll get a one nighter somewhere to clean.

The rest of the day, I go to the library to work on writing my feature films. I'm so eager to get them completed. I still have a lot of work to do. I'm taking my time but be dedicated because I want them to be good.

My little niece called to talk to me yesterday. I felt so sad. She said, "You left me." It brought tears to my eyes. We had gotten closer when I went home in August. She is such a beautiful flower.

That's all for tonight. I have a job interview on Friday at Target. I sure hope I get the job. I'll let you know.

JUST GET OUT OF THE HOUSE

As I was trying to be lazy today, God pushed me out of bed. So I went and got some icecream before sitting down to log online. Then I saw the profile of this man's face and recognized him. I stopped him and it was a long time client/friend of mine. If I had not gotten out of the house, I would have missed a blessing.

My friend now writes for a show on Fox and has invited me down to the show to meet the directors once I told him I'd graduated and now direct. There was no hesitation in his thoughts. I was renewed once again in the kindness of people. To know that he wanted to help me after I had helped him in the past was refreshing and brought tears to my eyes.

You never know what God has in store for you but you must hear his voice and obey. Get out of the house and be around other people. God bless.

Change Is Coming

I sat and wrote some spec scripts for a particular show on Saturday. I got a good response on them. It really felt good to know that others could appreciate and see my talents. I'm so excited. I've always been a person of words. I love words. It saddens me that so many people totally ignore vocabulary words these days. Slang is cute at times but do you really think people speak that way in corporate America...nope.

I must come up with a way to help bring back WORDS...Vocabulary words. I use to sit and read the dictionary as a child to learn more words. I had a high school teacher who also loved words. We were best friends. I miss her much.

In conclusion, when we learn to change our words, our thoughts and dreams for better vocabulary words - change is coming. Many people believe you can speak things into existence. How can you do that if your words are not recognizable. Be blessed.

Love Yourself On This Valentine's Day!

I'm so glad that through all the pains and disappointments in my life, one thing has always remained true - I love myself. Don't get me wrong, I wish I was thinner right now and my hair was back at its normal length but I still overall love who I am as a person, a human being.

I'm sitting here writing sample specs to a show on this lover's day and I am loving what I'm writing lol. I'm so glad that I have many different avenues that I can take to reach my destiny. I thank God for that. All employers want their employees to be multi-taskers lol. So I'm happy that I can write, produce, direct, even edit. In this industry, it helps to be a person of many talents.

I encourage you to love yourself, just as God loves you. People treat you how you treat yourself. If you don't love you - how can you expect others to. Search your heart and soul to find what makes you love you.

Just Keep Going

I had a rough few weeks but I know to just keep going. This economy is bad right now but I feel that God doesn't have a bad economy. I have the nerve to believe that I am supposed to be exempt from this lol. I do. I know deep in my heart that my prayers will be answered soon so I'm just gonna keep going. We all must keep going because one day we will laugh at this time in our lives.

I did more cold calls this week and sent emails. I actually got a call back on one of the projects but it was only her saying that she received my resume but they were all staffed up. I was so mad lol. I was thinking - I don't need a phone call for you to say you got my resume...only for you to say I'm hired. lol But it was nice of her to call I guess.

May God be with you all.

GOOD & BAD AT THE SAME TIME

I had some people come through for me on the letters of recommendation so I'm so excited about that. The Rodney Perry Show will air 3 episodes on the promotional flatscreens in Roscoe's Chicken & Waffles so I'm excited about that. I got fired from a temp job today so I'm not so excited about that...lol Wow, it amazes me how good and bad can manifest at the same time. Truth is - I needed the money but fact is - it wasn't enough money and I hated that job. So everything happens for a reason right.

Good thing is - I lost one pants size so far. Bad thing is - I missed a few days of exercising last week lol. But I'm gonna make it up this weekend. Good thing is - I can workout every morning now. Bad thing is - I have no job. Good thing is - I know God will provide as he has always done. Bad thing is - I don't know the plan lol.

I just want you all to know when good and bad happens at the same time. Lean more on the good things and you will find yourself laughing at the bad. Good always outweigh the bad. We must continue to be strong and prosper. God Bless.